Monday, May 13, 2019

On a Lonely, Lonely Trail



Sometimes, when I'm on a walk, by myself, all alone, I have these thoughts that I'm sure men don't have...



I love the outdoors and going on walks. And sometimes I go by myself. And it's always during these times that a bunch of crazy thoughts run through my overactive mind. What if something happens to me? What if someone tries to steal me? What if...? 

I'm sure it's because I've seen too many scary movies in my life (I blame my mom!), and I'm also sure it's because I'm a woman. There's a certain vulnerability I feel because I'm female. It's just like walking to my car, at night, in a deserted parking lot. Right? Always looking over my shoulder and then thanking God when I finally make it in my car and safely home.

Sometimes when I'm walking on a trail, and I look as far as my eyes can see ahead of me and behind me, and I see NO ONE. At these times I start to get a little anxious. The other day, no lie, this happened. There was no one in sight!!!  And then all of a sudden, the wind picked up, and the leaves started to move and swirl, and I swear it felt like a scene out of Bird Box with Sandra Bullock. Some mysterious force was out to get me! Except...I lived to tell about it (ha!).

And here's the thing. I always encounter other walkers eventually (mostly women), and I tell myself I'm overreacting. After all, they seem fine. I'll be fine too. At times, I try to wait around for other walkers and trail behind them, so I feel safer.  I'm fully aware this is a fear of mine. But what I won't do is let that fear keep me from enjoying one of the things I love most...the outdoors!

No comments: